Weekend at Bernie's (1989)
I give it an 8.3.
THE SUMMARY: Two young insurance company workers accidentally uncover the boss’ fraud, so he plans to kill them at his beach house but gets himself killed, and the guys have to maintain the party by pretending he never died at all. See - it’s funny because it’s implausible that people would believe a lifeless body is in fact alive. That’s it - that’s the joke. Nothing clever. Nothing interesting, other than a few RBG or Biden memes 30 years later. I do not, in fact, give it an 8.3. Unless it’s out of 20 Wickies.
FROM MOVIE-PICKER SERGE: Bruges isn't even close to Weekend at Bernie's when it comes to ‘the best dark comedy of all time.’ Plus Matt may finally learn the meaning of that ‘Weekend at Ginsburg's’ meme from 2 years ago.
THE BEST:
The body-burying boy: He’s by far the funniest part of the movie, and unlike the rest of the thoroughly beaten dead Bernie, his bits are mercifully short. They may not be sharply written, but the delivery on the ‘kiss this!’ line and the middle finger are A+. That kid is Jason Woliner, who has since built a career for himself, directing the Borat sequel, writing for Parks and Recreation, and working on other productions.
Five minutes worth of dead body slapstick: Heh, Bernie’s body fell off the deck. Heh, Bernie’s body got pulled out to sea with the tide. Heh, Bernie’s body is getting dragged behind the boat. Don’t get me wrong - I laughed. But then I chuckled. And then I smirked. And then the bit was dead and they still kept doing it. Having no more depth than that is a problem.
Fine - I get the memes: But c’mon. I already did. He’s dead, and they’re pretending he’s alive. It’s not so complex that I had to watch 90 minutes of it to understand. The memes are as shallow as the movie.
THE WORST:
It’s just not that funny: For a movie to abandon any attempt at suspense, philosophical dilemma, or any other intrigue for the sake of comedy, the comedy must be excellent. Bernie’s comedy is not. The writing isn’t clever. The characters aren’t interesting. In fact it’s hard to pick even a single memorable quote from this movie. It’s just the same dead body joke repeated. It’s worth a chuckle the first time. After an hour and a half of it, it might be better to actually be Bernie than to watch the movie about him.
The romance is pure nonsense: What little attempt there is at romance is completely nonsensical. Gwen dislikes and distrusts Richard because he can’t stop lying - some of those lies being legitimate and some just perceived because of Richard’s prior habit. But she still falls for him despite no improvement in that flaw. He never does anything to actually earn her love, and she never explains why she’s suddenly moved past the issue. He keeps lying, and she just falls for him anyway.
And speaking of her disdain for his lies, how the hell did she know that his aunt did not in fact die? When Gwen first arrives at Bernie’s house, she asks Richard how his aunt is, and he says she died, which Gwen accepts. Later, when Richard is telling Gwen that Bernie is dead, Gwen responds ‘like your mother and father were dead? And your aunt is dead too?’
Perhaps the explanation is just that all the death claims stacked too high to be believed, but if that’s the case, then why did Gwen buy it originally? Why didn’t she have immediate doubt considering the claim about his parents?
I know - it doesn’t matter. The point isn’t the specific foundations of their romance. The point is ‘dead man funny.’ Fair enough, but he isn’t.
Why is Richard wearing a wedding ring?: Throughout the movie, Richard is wearing a wedding ring, or at least a ring on his left ring finger, typically the spot for a wedding ring. There are several theories about why: some say it’s just a mistake, and some say it isn’t because the actor wasn’t married at the time, so this ring is some sort of deliberate choice.
Either way, it’s dumb. I wouldn’t be so picky and particular if it wasn’t so clearly visible in such a plot-relevant way. When Richard brings Gwen home after their first date, this ring is shining brightly, right in front of her face. For her not to have any questions about that, in a strange situation that prompts plenty of other questions for her, is bizarre. If the point is making him an even bigger liar, why isn’t this gigantic lie ever addressed? If it’s just a mistake, how does nobody in the cast or production crew notice such an obvious one?
Staring at it right in front of her face.
THE RATING: 2/5 Wickies. I award one extra Wicky for the occasional slapstick chuckle, but only five minutes of that is necessary. The rest is a complete waste of time.
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NEXT WEEK: Tropic Thunder (2008) wins the audience selection from show production assistant Dangerous Spaces’ list of nominations last week.
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